HISTORY

Femme Size

by Rhond (47-G-1)

Graphic retrospect of specific childhood events is admittedly difficult, sometimes impossible. To my vague recollection pre-puberty youth for me, was entirely de- void of transvestic association. There occured during my adolescence however, incidents and feelings which although seemingly innocuous at the time, were in all probability preliminary to an eventual transvestic emer- gence.

Complete eonism was not to be expressed until I was well into my third decade. And it was to follow at least ten years of gradual mostly subtle development, unre- cognizable at first but gaining impetus, particularly gathering momentum during the later years. I find it difficult to isolate particular causation or dominant events Either during or prior to this formative period, which could account for my vital preoccupation with femme- personation. But I do recall being strangely and strongly attracted to the clothing worn by my feminine classmates and companions. Curiosity led to desire, and eventually I was to don the garments of my younger sister. The result was erotic stimulus and accompanying self induced sexual satisfaction. These infrequent excursions in femme dres- sing were invariably followed by feelings of guilt and shame. My singularly unaccountable association with feminine clothing at that time would seem to have been more related to fetchism. But I now realize that these yearnings were latent embryonic sparks of femme person- ation.

I subscribe to the premise that no person can success- fully practice self-psychoanalysis. A person is too close to his psyche to be objective. So rather than attempt self- analysis, I want to elaborate on a vital positive physical emotional factor which although not in itself a cause for transvestism, is directly related in my case.

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